The removal and examination of a sample of tissue from a living body

8 February 2007

Bajo,

There are a quaint few that have interacted with these possibilities;
a voice over a phone concerned though, because of male oppression
unable to hear, only worry. More of a weight one might say, so I
attempt the explanation of fear and my own concern, the Mason simply
says he cannot go into detail, for what he has seen is horrific. Some
believe that when one is in pain you show them that you have been in
equal or worse pain, believe this will somehow assist. I am beyond the
point of perspective. There is no one else that can live in the eyes
of others better than I, unfortunately, for this is a gift I would
willingly bestow to anyone willing to receive. But as the Mason I
allow him to think he is serving, for the reality is he must believe
this in order for me to keep a father.



How old could I have been to reverse this? Five? Fifteen? Perhaps when
I lived on the beach, or in the city, or in the forest, or the
highway, the mountains, the gothic structures? There might have been a
chance had I seen the possibility of possession, the reality that some
people are not good all the time, more, some people are wrong and
diseased, and some people do not make sounds for the rest to hear
them. I have recently wondered what of the structure of nature or
culture has seeped into me these years while I have been gross with
distraction, disgusting in the contradiction of deed. I lied last week
and said the importance of the most important was not wanted any
longer, and this morning while late for class on pleasure and desire I
saw the little one on a balcony, fitting gloves over smaller yet hands
and I understood the severity. This is when my human will gain, the
top white notch, and I will patch myself to the tape and to the burn,
and finally to the electrical. I have made choices of laughter my
entire life, some say contagious, some say invasive, and I say now
that I no longer can laugh at myself, nothing about this is funny,
nothing, nothing, black.



P.S. I do not leave the blood for you love, how we seek each other is
nothing of this.


Caridad